First attempt at commercial
My friends and I recently graduated high school and were paid to create a series of internet commercials to advertise ExchangeSuite.com
Here is one of the commercials from the collection. Any and all critiques and feedback are welcome and appreciated. Thanks!
Eric
Why does he jump out of bed and hurry to the computer?
The Korova milkbar sold milk-plus, milk plus vellocet or synthemesc or drencrom, which is what we were drinking. This would sharpen you up and make you ready for a bit of the old ultra-violence.
The character, Gemmy, is somewhat of a quarky spazz. He is the face of the campaign and is used consistently in all the commercials. I suppose he is excited to get online and see what's available to trade, while lacking the coordination necessary to do so.
You might want to lose the nose-picking part. TV commercials are gross enough as it is.
His opening line should be something like 'oh crap i forgot her Birthday" and i gree lose the nose picking
I thought of that, but unless the service does same day delivery, it doesn't work. Yup lose the nose picking and come up with a reason why he's in such a hurry or it doesn't make sense.Originally Posted by shoestringconcerts
The Korova milkbar sold milk-plus, milk plus vellocet or synthemesc or drencrom, which is what we were drinking. This would sharpen you up and make you ready for a bit of the old ultra-violence.
I liked the nose picking actually, it kinda summed up the stereotype for me. The website font at the end wasn't good enough though, too basic and appeared slightly too late after the car.
Thanks for the input everyone
Posting Permissions
Reply With Quote